I was wrong. Not in being confident, but to think that I had It All Figured Out. I should have just been quietly confident; but nooooooo. Little Miss Smarty Pants had to go around making all kinds of declarations.
Sadly, it took me less than five minutes to compile a list of the Top Ten Things I SWORE I Would Never Do, and the Nine That I Did.
- Let my fingernails look bad. I bit my nails as a kid, and when I stopped, I vowed I would never, ever, nope NEVER have scraggly fingernails again. I distinctly remember thinking one evening, as I buffed and polished, that even after I got married and had kids I would keep it up. I mean really, how hard can it be? Dear 1991 self: it’s too hard.
- Marry someone without a college degree. Oops.
- Wear turtlenecks with prints. I decided this after the whole Preppie Handbook thing finally died down and I could stop wearing turtlenecks with whales and whatnot on them. Every year, I bust out my Pumpkin Print Turtleneck to wear to my kids’ Harvest Parties. Ugliest. Shirt. EVER.
- Weigh over 125 pounds. Ha! Ha ha! Yeah. About that…
- Let my dog sleep in my bed. When I got my dog, I was just recovering from dating a really stupid guy. For some reason, I still took his advice on dog matters, and listened when he told me that dogs should be crated at night. I spent a lot of money on a crate. The first night at home, I put my dog in the crate. My dog cried. I cried. I let my dog out of the crate. She hopped into bed. I donated the crate to a shelter, and we have pretty much held onto our sleeping arrangement for the past 13 years.
- Let my kids sleep in my bed. I was adamant about this one. Until I had kids, and was too lazy to get up and keep feeding them every 5 minutes. Both of my kids slept with us until they were about six months old. We all slept much better that way, although, as you can imagine our bed was a little crowded for a few years.
- Drive a minivan. I lasted six years, then when A.P. asked me why I didn’t drive on field trips like the other moms my heart broke into five million pieces and I was behind the wheel of a Kia Sedona approximately three seconds later.
- Have a smartphone. I’m sorry, Droid. My precious. My sweet, little baby; I had no idea how much I would love you.
- Live in Grand Rapids. I know, right?! I thought it was uppity and pretentious. One of two things happened. Maybe I was completely wrong, or, I am now uppity and pretentious. Either way.
And the last one. The one thing I swore I would never do, and still haven’t done.
10. Live in the country. But guess who started looking at houses with ‘a little land’ this weekend?
Why do I bother?
I declare that I am never going to declare anything again. Ever.
What have YOU said you would never do – but did?
This post is linked up to Top Ten Tuesday at Oh! Amanda.